3 purple lies


I was really looking forward to Monday.  I had just completed a crapload of work: exams, marking, unit planning, report cards......the list goes on.  Monday was the day when I could take a deep breathe and relax.  No more work at home when I could be playing with my kids or doing my thang.
But for some reason, my day went the other way and by the time I had got home, I was a grouch and I couldn't really pin point a reason.
I really don't like getting into those types of moods because even when husband is wanting to do something to help me out, I can't figure out why I'm mad in the first place.  It's the most useless feeling ever.
So I took some time and I thought.
Maybe that's one of the benefits of being comfortable at 33.  I like 33; it's a good number.  I feel like I'm drifting away from my 20s and settling happily into the 30s.  (While still feeling safely far from 40)
At 33, I am comfortable with who I am. I know I have weaknesses and they don't limit me, or make me feel ashamed.  I know that I can get grouchy but I'm confident in my ability to figure out exactly the root of the problem and work on it, instead of taking it out on people.
Like tonight.
All it took was a vent to a friend, a walk with the sister and bam, my problems were identified and dealt with.  Well not really dealt with but more like they were acknowledged and in acknowledging them I took away their control.  It's nice to know that I can figure out what was bugging me and let it out safely.  I love my friends for that.
I feel so good being able to get things off my plate, regardless how crazy I sound and it's nice knowing that I'm not being judged- and even if I were being judged, it's reassuring to know that my friendships are deeply rooted enough that they can survive conflict.
I love that my friends know me so well that they know when to listen and when to offer the perfect advice, and even when to tell me when I'm wrong.  We talked a bit about that this past weekend at the girl's night- about how special our friendship is because we've been in each others lives for so long.  25 years for some! Even my 'newer' friends, which aren't new friendships by any means if you're talking the almost 10 years that Kerri, Heidi, Jordan and I have been playing ball together...even those friendships are strong enough to know how to handle each other.  So thank you Jordan for hearing me out today.
I relish in my walks with my sister when we're both feeling a little off.  Our Grandma is not doing well (mom's mom) and likely won't be with us much longer.  She's only sleeping, having trouble breathing and not eating and I'm afraid this is the end of the line.  It's so sad to see our mom and aunts have to go through this and it just makes me want to rock my baby longer at night. Ugh. But my mom is being so positive and strong- I very much admire her right now.
Update. Grandma passed away last night. :( Please say a prayer for her.

So after getting all that off my chest, I felt a lot better.  Plus the Blue Jays won and Jose hit a home run.
Life is good when you can see the good. That's what my mommy taught me today.



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Have a lovely day!