3 purple lies

An open letter to a friend


It's been 6 months since you lost Tripp and there still isn't a day that goes by that my heart doesn't ache for you.  I can't even begin to imagine the pain that you and Hugh have experienced and the emptiness you feel from your loss. I do find, however that the strength and honesty that you share with us daily on your blog is healing and beautiful, which inspires me to make the changes I need in order to live a good life.
Today is a milestone day. The 23rd.  For some reason in the grieving process that one date always hits you.  Mine is the 14th. Every single month for the first year after Kelly died, I cried on the 14th like it had just happened.  Slowly it got easier and eventually I got to the point where I didn't cry as often and rather smiled a reminiscent smile.  My wish for you this month is that it gets less painful for you and that you can find a way to breathe through the layers of pain.
Each month I've tried to find a way to honour your little boy's memory and to show you my support around this time.  This month I'm doing something a little different.  
Part one:  Meet Yuli.  She is now our 'sponsored' child through World Vision in memory of Tripp.  Someone is going to have a little bit of a better life because of your boy.

The second part of my month's efforts to put a smile on your face is reliant on the readers of my blog. Most of you know me, therefore you know Jordan's story.  If you don't, then start here.  What I'm asking of my readers is to take a moment out of their day and to leave a comment on this post to Jordan. This may work or it may be an epic fail, but I'm willing to try.
Leave words of encouragment, words of inspiration, gratitude, whatever, just something that can give her a boost when she needs it the most.  Leave your name, leave it anonymous, whatever just do something today to make someone smile.
Reach out.  Bring a little peace into the world. I guarantee you it'll help my friend today.

Here's to hoping that you can find feel the love that surrounds you,
Love you lots.



  1. What a great idea Deena!

    Jordan - your strength and love for Tripp are admirable. You are in my thoughts often and I pray that time can lessen your pain. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.

  2. Deena, you are a wonderful friend and an inspiring person!!

    Dear Jordan,
    I read your blog everyday and through it even realized that I did gymnastics with Jess back in the day. On this day and every day I think about you and your family. No one should ever have to say good bye to the ones they love, especially a child, especially your baby. By telling your story you make me want to be a great Mom and an inspiring person. You have touched more lives than you will ever know. Today, I give my little girl an extra hug and a big smooch in memory of Tripp, I hold her a few extra seconds before naps wishing you peace.
    Thank you for sharing your story.

  3. Dear Jordan

    You are often in our thoughts and prayers. I follow your blog daily and wanted to let you know it has made an impact in my life. I can only imagine people who have gone through similar circumstances and the way it has helped their lives. I think you are a strong and wonderful person. Karter and I will say a special prayer for you and your family tonight.

  4. Jordan,
    I hardly know you but I continue to think of you daily. Your story has impacted my life in many ways and I strive daily to be a better person because of your blog. I always hug my son a little tighter thinking of Tripp. I wish for you peace and healing and hopefully soon you can remember Tipp with more smiles then tears.

  5. Many Hugs Jordan. I wish I could do more for you, lesson your pain somehow. All our love, thoughts and prayers...
    Lisa W.

  6. Dear Jordan,

    I am amazed at the strength that shines through your words. I don't know if you will ever really know how far widespread the positive impact Tripp's life has had and will continue to have because of your blog. Each night, I hug my daughter tightly and think of Tripp. Since reading your post about random acts of kindness, I have done a few, small things, but have done it in memory of Tripp (buying coffee for the person behind me at Timmie's, leaving coins in shopping carts etc).

    Although we've never met, I wish I could give you a great big hug today.


  7. Jordan & Deena,
    It was so great to get together on monday & visit again. But its more than a visit. I am so thankful to be surrounded by such great friends, to be able to share love, loss, laughter, & pain with just a simple unconditional understanding. Even though we may not see each other daily, there is something about being able to catch up with people & pick up where you left off without missing a beat. Friendships that are genuine,relaxed, non judgemental and are always there.
    love you girls

  8. Reading your blog Jordan was truly inspirational. The strength, wisdom and insight that you show is amazing. I'm often struck by what you post Deena, but today, this hit me on many levels. My son Simon spent 2 weeks in the NICU. Both he and I almost didn't make it due to pre-eclampsia. I could relate to the stories of emotion, stress and the humour that was the nurses! My heart breaks for your loss. A miscarriage in March, and the loss of my brother 3 years ago were at the forefront of my mind as I read your words describing your grief and loss. While I only know of you through your blog, you impacted and inspired me today. I wish for you much happiness and peace.
    - Chantelle A.


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